


Inappropriate Material

by IrisParry



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: M/M, delete kylo ren's browser history, hux/paperwork is the real otp
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-26
Updated: 2016-07-26
Packaged: 2018-07-26 23:37:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7594798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IrisParry/pseuds/IrisParry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Dear Mr Ren,</i>
</p><p>  <i>Your holonet access has been suspended until further notice. </i></p><p>  <i>As you will recall from section 43C(ii) of the Employee Handbook (distributed at your induction day), holonet access on a working vessel is a privilege, not a right, and may be revoked at any time. Holonet restrictions are in place for crew members' safety and to maintain operational effectiveness. </i></p><p>  <i>The following breaches have been detected on your account.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	Inappropriate Material

**Author's Note:**

> I made [ this post ](http://irisparry.tumblr.com/post/147894741614/636-the-redheads-category-on-pornhub-is-my) based on the text from last night - _(636): The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind Facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem._ [unlikelymilliner](http://unlikelymilliner.tumblr.com) asked me
>
>> Does Hux with his infinite need of control know that Ren’s holonet history is like 90% “redhead twink get pounded by beefy smuggler”? because I kinda want to read the fic where he finds out because he’s def spying on Ren, the creep. 
> 
> ... and here is my answer. Thanks to [jonstarks](http://jonstarks.tumblr.com) for giving it the once-over. 

_Dear Mr Ren,_

_Your holonet access has been suspended until further notice._

_As you will recall from section 43C(ii) of the Employee Handbook (distributed at your induction day), holonet access on a working vessel is a privilege, not a right, and may be revoked at any time. Holonet restrictions are in place for crew members' safety and to maintain operational effectiveness._

_The following breaches have been detected on your account:_

Hux sat back in his chair to review the list. He raised his glass - he'd given in and poured a precious measure of the good brandy - and swirled the contents, inhaled deeply before taking a sip.

There were so very _many_ of the breaches. Since what passed for Ren's contract of employment placed considerably more emphasis on giving oneself to the Dark Side than on shift times and minimum hours, his numerous breaches of the directive on holonet use during core working hours were probably unenforceable, but the content matters alone were more than sufficient to cut him off. 

The First Order was, at its heart, a military organisation, and under no illusions about the crucial role of pornography in maintaining staff morale. Access to several appropriate, officially sanctioned sites was permitted, during users' leisure hours, where sexual gratification could be obtained with optimum efficiency alongside reinforcement of key messages about family structures and personal hygiene.

Kylo Ren's appetites were not sated by such material. Shortly after his arrival on the Finalizer he received an automatically-generated first warning notice regarding his viewing of "Concordia Cockslut Cowboys VII", or at least the first fifteen minutes of it, three nights in a row. Human resources had barricaded themselves in and sent distress signals indicating the ship was under attack by pirates before Hux could resolve the situation. 

Exempting Ren from the automatic enforcement system saved a great deal of property damage - and it also led Ren to believe that his holonet use would be unmonitored from then on. Hux had very carefully said no such thing, and then watched with amusement as Ren threw caution to the wind, watched and compiled a damning dossier of filth and depravity whose day would assuredly come.

Hux took a bigger sip of the brandy as he reached the more recent logs, shifted back in his chair a little. At first Ren had gone for fairly generic stuff, the kind of notorious parodies that teenage boys might mock their peers with, that a young man might enjoy at the stage of his life where the mere fact that everyone involved was male was quite enough. Checking Ren's browsing history at the end of a long day, alone in his quarters, Hux found himself oddly charmed by the naïveté. 

Hux's kindly disposition toward Ren would typically last a matter of minutes in the man's company, however. Hux had kept himself from throwing the ridiculous holo titles at Ren in spite, but it was a close thing on a couple of occasions. Especially when Ren left the mask off. He would sometimes after they'd seen the Supreme Leader, and retired to Hux's office to scream at each other about their interpretations of the broader intent behind his orders. Ren had a good face, it turned out, in an asymmetric, illogical way that made Hux vaguely angry. Hux wondered how he would look, confronted with his clumsy, adolescent desire. If he would flush bright red, all the way to his ears, or if Hux would be able to watch the colour drain from it. If his lips would part in a soft, shocked gasp. 

As it was, Ren would simply replace the mask when he exhausted his supply of witless retorts, and sweep out of the room. Hux would put his personal feelings aside and continue with his shift, because he was a kriffing professional, but later he would find himself checking Ren's history, gritting his teeth and hoping for something especially beastly. Sometimes the timestamps barely seemed to give the man enough time to tramp dramatically back to his quarters after their exchange of views.

And Ren began to branch out. To refine his searches, to finally grasp the concepts of tagging and categories rather than going to the same dreary titles he'd probably been surviving on since he was fifteen. It was a wonderful fresh vein of filth, new and disgusting parts of Ren's inner life revealed to Hux. But ... a pattern very quickly emerged.

_redheaded twink gets pounded by beefy smuggler_

Armitage Hux was a man of the galaxy, and a man whose rank afforded him a private secure holochannel in his own quarters. He was familiar with the terminology, and mildly insulted for reasons he didn't want to dwell on. He'd watched that one, as he occasionally did for security purposes, to check the material against the directives and confirm the breach.

_ginger spaceport slut takes on more than he can handle!!!_

Ren's mind worked in entirely unmysterious ways: after he argued with Hux, he like to watch slight redheaded men debase themselves with hulking athletic types who had undoubtedly undergone several illegal medical enhancements. Logistically, the proceedings were almost impressive. Perhaps the only feature Hux had in common with the protagonists save hair colour was their single-minded determination when faced with a challenge, though he doubted Ren appreciated that aspect. Sometimes the hair colour was obviously obtained through dye: Ren generally only viewed those for a matter of seconds. 

_shy strawberry cadet gets top grades in cocksucking class_

Numerous uniform violations, sloppy salutes and the pedestrian tastes of the 'officers' usually prevented Hux suspending his disbelief in the military category. Ren watched one particularly egregious example over a dozen times, usually at the end of a lengthy browse in which nothing else quite seemed to do the trick. The air of defeat about its appearance at the end of the list was delicious. In it, a skinny officer who almost certainly couldn't pass his yearly physical chastised a well-built man of unclear rank. The man's bulging muscles sported several obscene tattoos that would have earned him a dishonourable discharge from any vessel of Hux's. 

The officer screamed and bawled and waved a finger in the man's face, until the big idiot smirked, made some ridiculous comment about showing him how bad he could be, and promptly bent the officer over his desk. Rather than deploying his standard issue stun blaster, the officer had squealed and gasped and begged for harsher treatment, called the insubordinate bastard "sir" on demand, and further disgraced his office by allowing the other man to ejaculate copiously on his uniform's insignia. 

_its mutiny! hung recruit gives brass a taste of discipline hardcore POV fuck_

Hux snorted as he read on. Ren only obsessed over these preposterous sexual scenarios because he thought it was how he'd finally get to _win_. The idea that behind every man of authority lurked a secret submissive, just dying to be manhandled by the right barbarian, was laughable. Ren's face would be a picture when his sleazy lines and impertinent hands met with cold fury instead of fawning capitulation. He'd smirk and lean in, gripping Hux's waist to try to control him, but a sharp backhand would stop him in his tracks. Hux smiled, absently digging his fingers into his thigh beneath his desk. Ren’s pale skin would pink marvellously; his lips already looked swollen, ready to split. 

_Bareback Of The Clones: How Many Can This Tiny Redhead Take??!_

The gall of the man. Sitting there in his quarters, slack-jawed, those long, thick fingers around his cock, grunting away all night. All night, in the middle of the working day, whenever he damn well pleased. Obscene. Disgusting.

Hux knocked back the last of the brandy. Ren thought he could give the orders? A fistful of his hair and he’d go to his knees as easy as any of these supposed tough cases. Hux had met enough, fucked enough, shut the door on their pouting afterwards.

_If you wish to contest this decision, you may submit Form HP36k, along with six copies of any supplementary materials, within 15 days of this notice. Holonet access will remain suspended pending review._

Hux deleted the final paragraph from the standard letter, and began typing.

_Breach of the holonet policy is a serious offence, and punishment must be severe. You are hereby ordered to report to the General’s quarters for disciplinary action immediately._

**Author's Note:**

> Complaints about the clones pun can be directed to my [tumblr.](http://irisparry.tumblr.com)


End file.
